It's shaping up to be a dark weekend. Yet not weather-wise. It's about 35 degrees now, and at 7am it was already baking when Emese woke me at Betty's to move the car. I wasn't hungover - try as I might last night, I managed two sweet glasses of Cinzano and some lemonade. I had my first cigarette in well over a year and regretted it even as I was lighting it.
It was so good to be among people even though i was far from my usual self- and bless them, almost everyone mentioned it. Betty was very happy with the painting and the ciabatta (tightarse Anna's birthday presents) and we shared that this morning for breakfast. I will make a further bread attempt today (I do wonder why I bought the breadmaker if I insist on doing it all myself)
I loved the night to myself, in that old familiar room, but I woke under such an insistant cloud, that by 7.15 I was out in the yard in the brutal sun reading - wait for it - Dan bloody Brown. I got through half the book before B & P woke up.
After breakfast (even Pete like the ciabatta and that's saying something!) I got back in my saunapants and drove home in a sort of apathetic fug. I've reclaimed my right to listen to Placebo and Faithless and that was good, but at home I feel strangely lonely - stupid considering this is surely what I wanted.
I had a big mug of Paul, slapped another coat of paint on the chairs, sprayed the legs again (man that rust is insistent) and am about to head to the beach. Which brings me to the first negative thing about being single. Sunscreen - back - ? I'll have to look like a block of top deck this summer.
Jutka sent me photos of Mum with Ben. Mum looks so happy - grandson by proxy.
But rather than wallow- let me write about yesterday's beach experience. After work, I raced home, chucked off my clothes and put bathers on and raced (within the speed limit) to the beach. The Doctor was in, and I wussed around in the shallows, until I was hit with this sudden surge of "oh my god I LIVE HERE" as I looked out at the waves, and then I just plunged in. It was the most wonderful WONDERFUL feeling.
SPF30+
It was so good to be among people even though i was far from my usual self- and bless them, almost everyone mentioned it. Betty was very happy with the painting and the ciabatta (tightarse Anna's birthday presents) and we shared that this morning for breakfast. I will make a further bread attempt today (I do wonder why I bought the breadmaker if I insist on doing it all myself)
I loved the night to myself, in that old familiar room, but I woke under such an insistant cloud, that by 7.15 I was out in the yard in the brutal sun reading - wait for it - Dan bloody Brown. I got through half the book before B & P woke up.
After breakfast (even Pete like the ciabatta and that's saying something!) I got back in my saunapants and drove home in a sort of apathetic fug. I've reclaimed my right to listen to Placebo and Faithless and that was good, but at home I feel strangely lonely - stupid considering this is surely what I wanted.
I had a big mug of Paul, slapped another coat of paint on the chairs, sprayed the legs again (man that rust is insistent) and am about to head to the beach. Which brings me to the first negative thing about being single. Sunscreen - back - ? I'll have to look like a block of top deck this summer.
Jutka sent me photos of Mum with Ben. Mum looks so happy - grandson by proxy.
But rather than wallow- let me write about yesterday's beach experience. After work, I raced home, chucked off my clothes and put bathers on and raced (within the speed limit) to the beach. The Doctor was in, and I wussed around in the shallows, until I was hit with this sudden surge of "oh my god I LIVE HERE" as I looked out at the waves, and then I just plunged in. It was the most wonderful WONDERFUL feeling.
SPF30+
posted by BanAnna at 12/04/2009 10:30:00 pm
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